Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
  • About
  • Questions
  • Answers
  • Best Answers
  1. Posted: November 13, 2012In: Public

    A brilliant, genetically engineered con-artist has three days to find the scientist who programmed her to die on her twenty first birthday.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on November 14, 2012 at 11:26 am

    That is a good logline Fejumas, if con artist is important to the plot it could be replaced with Android. With only three days before her 21st birthday, a genetically engineered con-artist must hunt down her maker before she is terminated.

    That is a good logline Fejumas, if con artist is important to the plot it could be replaced with Android.

    With only three days before her 21st birthday, a genetically engineered con-artist must hunt down her maker before she is terminated.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  2. Posted: November 14, 2012In: Public

    As the ghost of a young man lingers in his apartment, he gradually transforms into a vengeful, evil spirit as he gets more and more jealous of his roommates' lives and becomes convinced that they are starting to forget him

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on November 14, 2012 at 11:18 am

    Is the Ghost the main character of the story?

    Is the Ghost the main character of the story?

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  3. Posted: November 11, 2012In: Public

    A doctor battles his fear of needles to rescue his daughter from a former physician, the source of his phobia, bound to his daughter by blood.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on November 13, 2012 at 5:18 am

    I decided to go back and review your previous logline attempts: ===== "When a school is held captive by the man responsible for the death of his sister, a doctor has visions of a lost childhood revealing the secret between his sister and the man that now threatens his daughter's life." ----- "With aRead more

    I decided to go back and review your previous logline attempts:
    =====
    “When a school is held captive by the man responsible for the death of his sister, a doctor has visions of a lost childhood revealing the secret between his sister and the man that now threatens his daughter’s life.”
    —–
    “With an entire school held captive, a doctor must relive a traumatic childhood that may solve the mystery behind the sadistic madman that threatens his daughter’s life.”
    —–
    “A doctor is forced to relive his traumatic childhood in order to solve the mystery that may save his daughter’s life.”
    =====
    The problem is you are presenting some abstract ideas that don’t really give us any clue to what’s going on.

    I would start with the best part of your loglines: “When his daughters school is held captive by the man responsible for his sisters death…” (This is very solid)

    The problem is, “Saving his daughter by reliving a traumatic childhood” or “saving his daughter by battling his fear of needles,” is way too abstract, it doesn’t tell us how does that action saves his daughter.

    —–
    “When his daughters school is held captive by the man responsible for his sisters death, In order to save her, a father must give clues to the police negotiator about madman’s mindset by undergoing hypno-therapy, reliving a traumatic experience”
    —–

    This would explain how reliving a traumatic experience would help save his daughter.

    However, my logline attempt is still too long and rough but hopefully you see where I am going with it. I hope this helps.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
1 … 1,210 1,211 1,212 1,213 1,214 … 1,233

Sidebar

Stats

  • Loglines 8,000
  • Reviews 32,189
  • Best Reviews 629
  • Users 3,731

screenwriting courses

Adv 120x600

aalan

Explore

  • Signup

Footer

© 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.