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A doctor battles his fear of needles to rescue his daughter from a former physician, the source of his phobia, bound to his daughter by blood.
I have to agree. A doctor battling his fear of needles isn't that compelling. Besides, if he had a fear of needles how did he even become a doctor. I have no idea what "bound to his daughter by blood" means. All fathers are bound to their daughters by blood. (Unless the daughter is adopted) If it'sRead more
I have to agree. A doctor battling his fear of needles isn’t that compelling. Besides, if he had a fear of needles how did he even become a doctor.
I have no idea what “bound to his daughter by blood” means. All fathers are bound to their daughters by blood. (Unless the daughter is adopted)
If it’s a former physician why does she need saved from him? I could see if it was her current physician and he was giving her bad treatment but if it is a former physician, unless he has kidnapped her (which would need to be mentioned) I don’t see how he can be such a threat.
That doesn’t mean you don’t have a good idea but the logline is more confusing than informative.
See lessWhen an evil, post-apocalyptic tyrant targets him for his scientific secrets, the last survivor of a 300 year-old life-extension experiment must find a way to keep his knowledge safe.
This logline is not focused on the lead character. When the last survivor of a longevity experiment is targeted by a post-apocalyptic tyrant, he must find a way to keep the knowledge safe or destroy it forever.
This logline is not focused on the lead character.
When the last survivor of a longevity experiment is targeted by a post-apocalyptic tyrant, he must find a way to keep the knowledge safe or destroy it forever.
See lessWhen an evil, post-apocalyptic tyrant targets him for his scientific secrets, the last survivor of a 300 year-old life-extension experiment must find a way to keep his knowledge safe.
I really like the premise of this script... but I think this logline is actually worse than your first attempt.
I really like the premise of this script… but I think this logline is actually worse than your first attempt.
See less