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A wholesome young woman gets her dream job at a cutthroat real estate agency but must compete with its high-powered male agents during a housing slump.
I understand the story, A woman is increasingly pressured to compromise her values in order to succeed at her job.However, one thing that might improve this logline is; (Besides the Job) what will the lead character lose if she fails?What are the stakes?In other words, A wholesome woman gets a job aRead more
I understand the story, A woman is increasingly pressured to compromise her values in order to succeed at her job.
However, one thing that might improve this logline is; (Besides the Job) what will the lead character lose if she fails?
What are the stakes?
In other words, A wholesome woman gets a job at a cutthroat real estate agency, she is confronted with a situation where she must compromise her values… so she quits.
But if she can’t quit, if there is something that she will lose if she quits, then you have a real conflict.
You put your lead character in a deep hole and the only thing that will get her out of the hole is succeeding at her new job but in order to succeed at her job she must compromise her values and who she is as a person… Conflict
?
See lessWhen a young assassin discovers a conspiracy that could destroy the very nation she swore to serve, the hunter becomes the hunted when she becomes the target of the organization that raised her.
You should be more specific since a lot of what your art talking about in vague terms happens at the beginning of the script. "Discovers a conspiracy that could destroy the very nation..." What conspiracy? Is it a plot to kill the president? Is it a plot to take over the government? What is the consRead more
You should be more specific since a lot of what your art talking about in vague terms happens at the beginning of the script.
“Discovers a conspiracy that could destroy the very nation…”
What conspiracy? Is it a plot to kill the president? Is it a plot to take over the government? What is the conspiracy?
Also, what nation? Is there a reason you are keeping the nation secret?
Finally, what does this prompt your lead character to do? When she discovers the plot, what does your lead character plan to do about it?
Adding some specifics will help improve your logline.
See lessA high school dance challenges, socially awkward teen, to ask is jealous best friend for dancing lessons, after being asked out by the most popular girl in school.
"When he's asked to homecoming by the most popular girl in school, a socially awkward teen must seek dance lessons from his best friend who, unbeknownst to him, is secretly in love with him."
“When he’s asked to homecoming by the most popular girl in school, a socially awkward teen must seek dance lessons from his best friend who, unbeknownst to him, is secretly in love with him.”
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