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A troubled young woman, tying to outrun an oppressive past, flees to the outback, only to find herself in the way of an ancient malevolent spirit awakened by a thirst for revenge and hell bent on destruction.
If the past is important to the story then it is important to the logline. For instance if, ?in the past, your mild mannered family man was a mob hitman... now bad guys have come to town and his past becomes relevant to the story, then it needs to be in the loglineHowever I am not use how the abusivRead more
If the past is important to the story then it is important to the logline. For instance if, ?in the past, your mild mannered family man was a mob hitman… now bad guys have come to town and his past becomes relevant to the story, then it needs to be in the logline
However I am not use how the abusive past will be relevant to stopping an evil spirit…
As a result you should do one of two things,
1: ?Add to the logline how her past is relevant to the story…
or
2: Remove the beginning part of the logline and focus on what she must do to stop the spirit and leave her backstory for the script.
I believe either will improve the logline.
See lessA broke bounty hunter with schizophrenia and down to his final pill, must catch an elusive fugitive in extremely isolated territory before his hallucinations kick in.
Just saying your logline get's us right up to the point where the story will begin, then stops. Normally that would be the point where a logline would begin.Here would be an example of a logline that would start with the inciting incident then move forward (While still acknowledging the set-up) ----Read more
Just saying your logline get’s us right up to the point where the story will begin, then stops. Normally that would be the point where a logline would begin.
Here would be an example of a logline that would start with the inciting incident then move forward (While still acknowledging the set-up)
——
“When a serial killer abducts the mayor’s daughter, a former police officer with schizophrenia and only one pill left, must enter the world of rave culture to track down the murderer if he is to repay the life debt he owes the mayor from when they were partners on the force”?
—–
Obviously this is just an example and your logline would be different.
See lessA broke bounty hunter with schizophrenia and down to his final pill, must catch an elusive fugitive in extremely isolated territory before his hallucinations kick in.
You spend a lot of this on backstory and the set up which makes me worried about the forward story.
You spend a lot of this on backstory and the set up which makes me worried about the forward story.
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